I have not heard about a soldier dying in such a long time. As soon as Donald Trump is sworn in he starts alienating countries and even his own people. This is what you idiots who voted for Trump voted for, I bet 98% of you are regretting this. The mission as a president is to prevent war and make things better for the people in this country, and allied countries. I’m pretty sure soon we won’t have any allies. This fool has become a trigger for me. Every time someone mentions his name I shift into some hyper angry person. Then there is this whole I loathe Donald Trump rant that comes out of me. I’m pretty sure I will be intoxicated for the rest of this term. Don’t be surprised if you read a blog describing the taste of vodka.
I’m not a cubs fan, but I hope they win. I keep thinking about Kattie! She loved them. I miss talking to her. I miss my cousin too. They took her off life support recently, she was breathing on her own for a little while,but she left us early last Thursday. This year has been one shitty ass year. It seems my loved ones just keep leaving. Papa, Junior, Kattie, and now Shani. I’m worried about Mami. She drives me absolutely nuts, but sooner or later I’ll wind up in Houston. I’m the only child of hers who still gives a damn about her. At least thats how it seems. She’s close to family, but it isn’t the same. I can’t depend on people to look after what belongs to me, my mother. The previous reasons for moving to Texas have now changed. Lost in my thoughts as of late.
I have had some time to reflect upon a certain situation. When you are caught in your feelings, you look at things with clouded vision. You blame all the wrong people for things that occurred. The people blamed for the indiscretions of another are not guilt free, though. Let me just say that.They played their part in the madness of deceiving me, and shall never ever be trusted. There is only one person to blame for what has occurred and reoccurred. It is what it is, and I guess that’s all it is. Through all of this,I have learned a very valuable lesson. It is wise to think with your head, and not your heart. The heart can create feelings that we think is love when it’s really nothing more than a fairytale fantasy. Although it’s just supposed to be fantasy, it felt real to me. I can love someone and set them free, especially since it’s where they really want to be. I’ve taken myself out of the situation completely, this means I have given up. I don’t have the strength for this anymore. All parties can go and do whatever it is they want to do. When I say this, I say it without a cold heart. I am not and nor will I ever be that kind of person. Enjoy your life.
It’s super early and I just really need a good cup of coffee. Facebook and Twitter has me wondering this morning. When did birth control become the sole responsibility for the woman? I read some bullshit written by a female who is either clueless, or mommy dropped her too many times. She said, if women choose to have these children its their responsibility, and their fault they are single mothers, if the father doesn’t stay. On what planet does that statement make any sense? This is why I believe psychological evaluations should be done before individuals decide to procreate. A psychiatrist should let them know if they are mentally stable to take care of a child. I feel like this on subject of responsibility. If two people lay down and create a life, two people are responsible for the well being of the life THEY created. Oh, also for anyone who doesn’t want a child, but likes practice like they do. There’s this little thing we have called PREVENTION, try it. It’s not rocket science people.
First, let me say every one makes mistakes, and the heart wants what it wants. Everyone that knows me personally knows that I write about just about everything going in my life.You knew I’d write about this sooner or later. I’m sure everyone remembers my break up, and how it affected me. Here I was thinking, I had a shoulder to cry on, and that just wasn’t the case. I became collateral damage for a heartless troll scheming to get back at him. The one promise he and I made to each other, even if we broke up we would remain friends. That didn’t happen because the heartless troll was determined to keep us away from one another.
Yes, for this blog I’ll call her the heartless troll. She doesn’t deserve to be named, or that kind of fame. When you are hurt and in your feelings you don’t think logically. I confided in this person because I didn’t want to go to my family with this. She used me in her little game of get back at him. She manipulated him into thinking I hated him and vice versa. She took everything I said about him, which wasn’t malicious by the way, and went back to him with it. What kind of person does that? What kind of person sees someone hurting, and does things to make them hurt more?
She told me all this crap that wasn’t true. I ate it up because I was in my feelings, and not thinking logically at all. At this point in my life I should know that everyone is just not for me. After I got the full story I was on fire, and I mean my blood was boiling. Who in the fucking world does that? Why would you as a hurt person, turn around and hurt someone who has done nothing to you? You couldn’t be happy, so I can’t be. Trying to alter my reality, so my decision would turn out the way you wanted it to. I even gave you plenty of chances to come clean. Did you take one? No! You continued with your shenanigans. We had so much in common. We could have been good friends. You just mucked that all up.
You only continued to ask me about him to see if you’d been exposed. The jig is up. Your secret is out.I know everything, and why and how it occurred. You used my hurt feelings. What did you gain from it? Ask yourself that. It’s okay though. You have a fate worse than that and you don’t even know it. Every relationship you have from this point on will end in turmoil.Why? Because you’re selfish and heartless. These are the things that happen to heartless trolls, that take it upon themselves to hurt people who haven’t done jack to them. If you are reading I know you’re probably saying, but what about him? I’m not talking about him, I’m talking about you. Prepare yourself for your fate. HEARTLESS TROLL!!!!!
What happens in the dark will come to the light. I’m sure you can see the other end of the tunnel right about now.